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Sorry, Thanks

by Grandfather

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1.
Forgetting 02:03
this night is ending a perfect start to the rest of this episode why does it get so cold oh i don't know i keep forgetting i'm a crutch and nothing more lying on the cold hard floor and now it's spreading to all the people that we know and love how could they be so rude oh i don't know
2.
3.
3am 02:11
it's 3am i'm up again can't get out of bed can't get out of my head it was outside your house that you told me that it's too late and you couldn't see me i never felt so lost, felt so broken now that i'm on my own i'll just keep beating on it's 3am i'm out again don't know where i am and where the fuck is sam it was outside your house that you told me that it's too late and you couldn't see me i never felt so lost, felt so broken now that i'm on my own i'll just keep beating on last sunday night when i saw your sister gave me a hug and said you'd been crying i'm just a little bitter, not broken now that i'm on my own i'll just keep beating on
4.
Mikal Sarah 02:14
take my hand it's more than we had planned, but that's okay i'll do it anyway, oh go away i'm watching you tonight don't fight me cause i'm just another one and now i think you're what i want can't tell, but i am falling harder for you each night i have these dreams, you're there please save me from despair
5.
Buried 04:31
6.
Views 03:07
taking back the things i thought i didn't say but the only forgiveness i get is it's okay it's not okay barely making the frayed ends meet slowly killing myself but i'm doing it anyway anyway don't you feel like there is value in finding value in the journey i think i might but i can't fix your broken outlook i'm probably wrong anyway she said she didn't want to be alive i'm not sure that i could even disagree what's the point of doing all these pointless things everything ends the same way anyway don't you feel like there is value in finding value in the journey i think i might but i can't fix your broken outlook i'm probably wrong anyway
7.
interlude 00:58
8.
and she said it's not easy you have to tell me what to do but she knows i'm just as lost and helpless too and i can't be responsible for the way you sort your thoughts but that has turned out far more convoluted than i thought it's not like i've never done this before i'm confused and all alone it's not like i've never done this before but i'm broke and broken and i'm on my own i thought that someday we'd be careless and we'd be fine living ignorant to the things we left behind but you are damaged and i thought i was immune and now we're riding tandem because i am damaged too it's not like i've never done this before i'm confused and all alone it's not like i've never done this before but i'm broke and broken and i'm on my own it's not like i've never done this before i'm confused and all alone it's not like i've never done this before but i'm broke and broken and i'm on my own
9.
i couldn't say what i wanted to say but i'm sitting here drinking and it's all okay i don't know what you wanted from me, but it's getting really cold and i don't wanna go away push pull and i'm over again and we'll follow the routine how can we be friends and everything i do is totally fucked i'm trying harder and harder and i am still out of luck my future self is a stranger what he goes through then doesn't mean a single thing to me right now so i'll sink into my self-destruction again and again waking up and i'm all out of line i'm a slow-burnt-baked-drunken mess all the time and i do it again disregarding any consequence but i can't pretend that it doesn't hurt and i know it kills me but where would the thrill be in a life of fulfillment nanananananananananananananananana my future self is a stranger what he goes through then doesn't mean a single thing to me right now so i'll sink into my self-destruction again and again and i know it's my time and i know i will die i'm gonna die and that's alright
10.
Saturnalia 04:00
over the river over the mountain we could get lost in the snow every shiver i heard the sound and wrapped you in layers of quilted wool what'cha think about all the things i said i will never believe in a coat of red do you want to see the forest for the trees maybe everything can be as magic as it seems and if your wishes all materialize will you take them and be blind but if you're looking through the white of the storm there's a grateful kind of warmth the drifts are piling up but we're not gonna stop we've got a date tonight we've gotta keep so there's no time to sleep whatever you just said flew right over my head so please repeat whatever you just said cause nothings makin' sense so keep me awake what'cha think about all the things i said i will never believe in a coat of red do you want to see the forest for the trees maybe everything can be as magic as it seems and if your wishes all materialize will you take them and be blind but if you're looking through the white of the of the storm there's a grateful kind of warmth
11.
smoking cigarettes and i'm late for work again but i work from home so it's not that far but i'm indisposed lying in my bed motionless motionless oh it's a wreck i don't know if i can go to life to day and put in the effort to make it seem like i'm not failing i'm not good enough nothing's good enough and we're in disguise as the shells of ourselves living day to day but it's hard today i'm not sure if i can finish anything i don't know if i can go to life to day and put in the effort to make it seem like i'm okay i'm okay i'm just okay i'm okay i'm just okay i don't know if i can go to life to day and put in the effort to make it seem like i'm not failing
12.
fin. 04:14
so why don't you take me again away from my schemes wailing at the thought of denial a compass broken but right time to time spiraling about all the progress others have made before i and i'm just as good as them why waste it you've got so much i don't know what the crowd is dancing about i'm taken but i don't want to be wide awake and it's just apathy it's safe to say this bed will be empty for a while an excess of those detrimental sharp against soft and you freeze maybe it's time for the ending and if you've got nothing to show who then can fix this oh i think it's easy to tell and it said oh why taste it you talk too much i'm not sure why this is so rough i'm wasted but i don't want to be alone tonight but please just talk to me why waste it you've got so much i don't know what the crowd is dancing about i'm taken but i don't want to be wide awake and it's just apathy why won't this end it's all i've ever wanted and thought but never conveyed it's my mind poisoned by itself you were right i should get help because i'm so tired of losing to you

about

Max played drums and sang
Ben played guitar and sang
Bryce played bass and sang

credits

released November 24, 2017

drums recorded by Sean Gillies at DB Nation
vocals recorded by Joey Angel in his lovely home
guitar recorded by Ben in his room
bass recorded by Bryce in his room
produced & mastered by Bryce in his room

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all rights reserved

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about

Grandfather Portland, Oregon

semisensical somethingerother from portland, thrown together quickly and carelessly by four degenerate children

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